So here's where the story ends…at least for the time being.

After the Consumerist was kind enough to air my plight to a larger audience, somebody in their comments mentioned that CompUSA had sold the MDA for the price I wanted: $250.

Of course, I don't know about your experiences with CompUSA, but I hate going in there. It's like a freaking ghost town in there. Trying to find an employee is like a cryptozoological expedition. But, dammit, I wanted the phone. So I was willing to brave the void.

Long story short, I was there on the one day that the one good employee was on hand. She took my information, looked me up in the system that T-Mobile has for them…and somehow, magically, I qualified for the right price. What a difference a day, and someone who gives a damn, makes. And, bonus, I only had to renew for one year instead of two.

So, what have we learned? When you're dealing with an asshole, bypass them if at all possible. And, thanks to the Net, we can share intel and outwit bastardy.

So am I still pissed at T-Mobile? Yeah. Like I said before, now I'm a customer who will be wary of recommending my carrier. And considering the bad press they've gotten, this is hopefully the most expensive $50 they've ever had to deal with.

–Sent from the MDA (and still getting used to the keyboard, so forgive and typos)

The Consumerist has helped me air my vitriol, for which I thank them. Welcome those of you who wandered here. The place looks like crap, I know, because it's my personal blog. The real stuff is here.

Anyway, first off, no, I'm not a pornographer. Being a writer and a webmaster generally ranks lower on the scale of acceptibility, whether people want to accept it or not, because at least if I was in porn, I more than likely wouldn't really need to worry about $50, would I?

And as somebody pointed out in the comments on that post, the $50 argument goes both ways. Well, it does–unless you're the customer. The $50 is the tipping point for the other things that I mentioned: the lack of network coverage and wide variety of dead spots, the fact that I have to stand with my face pressed against the window of my apartment to forward my phone to my home phone because I know I get crappy coverage inside. Now, here's the thing: I may get out there in the big wide world of carriers and not be able to find a better deal. I may get out there and find that other companies are worse. Hell, I may, as somebody pointed out, luck out and find a CompUSA that sells them for the price I want. And you know what? I'd probably renew for a year and grab the damn phone to be done with it. But in the end, the $50 has still taken me from somebody who has said "Yeah, I 've never had a problem with T-Mobile" for years and turned me into somebody who'll…um, get pissed enough to write two posts and get people from bigger sites than mine reading them.

And what I find so frustrating is that it is so fricking easy to please people. I wasn't asking for the damn moon. I wanted the same deal that Bailey got. If I had been a guy on for two years and he had been on for seven, I would have understood and probably plonked down the $300. But it's not even that. The woman on the phone could have made some kind of effort to keep me happy. How about this? We can't reduce the phone right now, but…

We'll renew you for one year instead of two? Fine–based on my track record I would have renewed for year #2 when the time came anyway. They lose nothing. Here's a gizmo whatzit accessory for free. Fine. Let's give you the $50 back by trimming $10 off your wireless data bill for the next five months. Perfect. Any of these solutions would have worked for me. But instead, it was: you might want to make sure that other companies don't overcharge you and wind up costing you more than the $50. Well, guess what? I'll pay more for a service that has people who can think creatively and solve customer problems. Gladly.

Or here's an even simpler solution: she notated my account about our conversation. I asked, "To what end?" I don't think I received a straight answer. If we couldn't have reached a solution then, she could have notated the account, "Call this guy back when we have a deal that will work," and said, "Okay, if we get a deal that we think we can work for you, we'll call you. I've notated your account and flagged it." Or even easier, "Give me your e-mail address and I'll make sure you get promotional offers there. You might find one that will work for you." Anything but we're sorry to lose your business but we just can't give a fuck would have been nice at that point.

Okay, I actually wanted to tell you about a good customer service experience as an example of how to handle things, but I'm hungry. So I'll be back. In the meantime, my books are there on the right hand side of the site. Buy them. Then I wouldn't care about $50, porn or not.

Here I am, writing to you from my Sidekick 1. I was hoping to be typing next to you from a brand spanking new MDA, but that was not to be.

Allow me to tell you my story.

I have been a proponent of T-Mobile for a while now. Why? Why have I tolerated a sub-par coverage plan with a half-assed signal? Very simple. Customer service.

It's amazing how little customer service it takes to instill loyalty, isn't it? Especially since customer service is a lost art. Two times T-Mobile did right by me…just little things, but they impressed me to the point that I decided to stick with them.

First, one time, out of the blue, walking into my office, my cell rang. It was T-Mobile, calling out of the blue to tell me that they reviewed my plan, and that my plan sucked and hey, here's another plan where you get everything on your present plan plus a bag of chips and it's cheaper. Did I have to renew for 12 months? Sure, but I would have overpaid them for less service anyway, so I was happy to say sure, hit me with that hot note. Thanks for calling.

Second time, I had called about something–don't even remember what–and the T-Mobile guy on the other end said hang on a second, let me take a look at your account. After a minute, he said, hey, we're charging you a la carte for a service tat you have in your plan already…here let me fix that…and…let me credit your account back to January for that (it was July)…all done. What else can I help you with today? Well, damn, when was the last time somebody did that for you? I was delighted.

So here we are. I've been a T-Mobile customer for seven years. As you all know, I have (and love) my Sidekick 1. I did not buy a SK2 because at the time, the SK1 was still working fine for what I needed. However, I've been ready for the SK3 for a while now, seeing as how my SK1 is about ready to go the way of all flesh. So I was waiting on the SK3, knowing that if I went with a SK2, exactly one week later the SK3 would be on sale, and basically it would kick the SK2's ass and take its lunch money.

So patiently I have waited, until recently, when I heard of the MDA. Basically, the MDA appears to have everything I would want in the SK3 and then some, plus it's available now. Bailey got one, so actually having one in my hands I could check out made me realize, ah, screw it, I'll go with the MDA.

So I went to a T-Mobile store, expecting to get a good deal…i.e. the same deal Bailey got. After all, we joined T-Mobile about the same time…surely my loyalty counted for something.

It did…just not as much as Bailey's did. So I find myself on the phone in the store talking to the customer care person. It seems very reasonable to me: I've been a customer for seven years, so has he, I know you call sell the phone at that price, you did it a week ago. Just give me the same deal. Nope, no dice.

I even played the Okay, Fine, I May Have to See About Dating Other Carriers Card. Made no difference. I said thanks, but no thanks, and got off the line.

So on my way to my car, that's when it hit me: seven year customer, spent in that time easily several thousand bucks on service, was standing in a store ready to sign up for two more years of service, ready to be happy with the phone I had decided I wanted. But no, sorry.

And that's when I got pissed off. Because what was the difference between happy loyal customer and disappointed customer ready to dump T-Mobile for somebody else? $50. My loyalty and what would be nine years of paying them–the closest thing to a sure thing sale you could have–wasn't worth fifty lousy dollars.

So at this point, it's not even about the $50. It's that T-Mobile thinks so little of me as a customer, they're going to, "generously," offer me the same deal they'd offer somebody walking in off the street to sign up for the first time.

And you know what? Fuck that and fuck them. I'm not bound to a contract, so if I can find a better deal elsewhere, I'll take it. Because I finally know what price tag to stick on customer loyalty.

Amazing how little it takes to make a customer happy, isn't it? And, conversely, how little it takes to piss one off.

Update: Howdy, Consumerist readers. The welcoming committee and more rant goes here.

Okay, just sat through a Catholic wedding. Two things immediately spring to mind.

If Frank Zappa and his band attend, would they have to wait until the "Seating of the Mothers" to sit down?

And there was a surveillance camera in the sanctuary. Can't God keep an eye on his own stuff?

–sent from the reception

So I have to show my license and sign a log to buy Advil Cold & Sinus. Think about this for a second, people. How is this going to stop any bad guy from buying what they need to make crystal meth?

All you need is a string of fake licenses with a real picture and fake information on them, and you can pretty much go from place to place buying the legal limit. And in the Atlanta area there's plenty of places. You could work your way around the perimeter in…God, how many weeks would it take, if you hit six stores a day? And don't we read all the time about how easy it is to make a fake license? It's one thing if they're going to be scrutinized by law enforcement, but these are being looked at by drugstore clerks. No offense to drugstore clerks, but I sincerely doubt they have the experience necessary to know a fake ID when they see one, at least one that's well put together. About the only scrutiny was to check the page before the one my info was on and ask me if I had purchased any Advil there before, seeing as how "There's a lot of Robinsons in the book." I bet you Smiths out there must have a helluva time.

And since this is going into a paper binder, when is it checked? Are they cross-referencing this with the video cameras in these stores? If not–and I think the answer is no–then it's useless. By the time anybody could possibly see past the ruse, you've got a big ol batch of meth going and the bad guys are enjoying themselves.

And me? I'm just a guy whose privacy has been violated because I'm a good guy and just live in a state with lots of pollen. I have no idea what this information is going to be used for, I was given no privacy terms or how long the information is going to be kept (answer to assume: forever), and didn't have time to make a stink about it because I had to get back to work so I could make money to pay the government to fund them screwing with my privacy even more in the long run.

Our ports aren't secure, our borders aren't secure, there isn't a goddamn thing secure in this country right now except stuff with pseudoephedrine in it. I'm so glad we've got our priorities straight.

It's just another random bag search. If I'm missing something tell me. Somebody please prove me wrong.

Update, or what passes for one, here.

The trailer for An Inconvenient Truth.

First of all, since this seems (seems?) to be a very liberally-minded film, I think it's amusing that the same folks who accuse the religious right of being so completely arrogant about putting a stake in the ground about their beliefs can be so equally arrogant when it comes to what, for many of them, is their own religion of choice: environmentalism.

Environmentalism is like a religion? Yes. Because just like a religion, you buy into it and simply stop thinking. I've been both a Christian and an eco-freak and I can tell you that, boy, did the two feel a whole lot alike. Why did I stop being them? I started thinking, honestly.

Back to the trailer, though: it says that there is a scientific consensus about global warming? For God's sake, when was the last time you heard a scientific consensus about anything? The heliocentric model? We live in a world where science can't even make up its collective mind about whether or not coffee will kill you, much less the causes of global warming. When somebody says, "Everyone agrees…" or "Scientists agree…"–whoever they are–then beware. They're urging you to not think.

I'm not just talking about how there are some scientists who will argue that evolution is bunk–you can always find somebody to disagree. After all, that's what the tenth dentist is for, right? Somebody, somewhere thinks something different. But, I mean, just a freaking Google news search will show you there's a wide variety of theories about global warming: the causes, how long it's going to last, what the effects are, and so forth and so on. There is no consensus it's even happening, as opposed to the consensus that, yes, mankind had to come from somewhere, be it from a divine hand or a monkey.

Do I claim to know everything there is to know about global warming? Hell no. I'm no expert–I'm a shmoe. What I do know, however, is that it is the height of human arrogance to assume that we can do anything to harm the planet. The planet's like a corporation. It doesn't love you or hate you or even give a shit about you. It's totally indifferent to the fact you're on it. This Gaia world-spirit nonsense is just that–nonsense.

I also know it is the height of hubris to assume that, when you look at what we do know about climate change versus what we don't know about it, well, it simply must be mankind's fault that things are getting hotter. Why? Because we're mankind, of course, and it scares the hell out of us when we consider that, in the cosmic view of things, we matter about as much as a housefly's fart. Because we can't deal with how insignificant we actually are, we have to go and claim hyperbolic nonsense like "We're killing the planet!"

And if you say, well, even before we have enough facts to figure out what the hell needs to be done, we have to do something–then be wary of how that can quickly lead down the path of not-thinking defined as "1) Something must be done. 2) This is something. 3) Therefore, it must be done." If you go that route, then, congratulations–you're fully qualified to become a lawmaker.

Anyway, as I said, there's no even a consensus the planet is getting hotter–I heard a scientist on the radio at one point talking about how the very concept of global warming is incorrect since not every place on the global is warming up! Some freaking consensus, folks.

So don't come and tell me that "Everybody knows" global warming is happening. That's a sure sign that you're not thinking and you're buying into whatever else they tell you. And if you're not a religious person and the concept of that Bible-thumping "God said it, I believe it, that settles it" rhetoric drives you apeshit…then exchange "God" for "Gore" in that idea. Think about how much like a televangelist Gore was acting in the trailer and ask yourself: how are you any different than the non-thinkers on the other side of the fence? Did you question anything he said? Or did you just accept it, like a good little member of the congregation?

Is it just me, or all the religious-minded blogs discussing the ins and outs of "The Gospel of Judas"…don't they sound like you or your friends when you're discussing stuff that takes place in comic books?

"Well, the Judas papers, even if they're real, don't negate anything that happened in the real gospels. This doesn't change anything about the story of Jesus. My faith is intact."

"Well, the JMS issues, even if they're canon, don't negate anything that happened during the real period of Spider-Man. This doesn't change anything about Spidey. My back issues are still under my bed."

I mean…think about it.