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Posted on 10.13.05 by Widge @ 8:37 am
It's not an everything bagel if it doesn't have everything on it. Otherwise it's a "almost everything" bagel or, more likely, a "few things" bagel. Get it straight. Filed under: General BS
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Posted on 10.13.05 by Widge @ 6:28 am
Check out this 1954 Christian children's activity book. Isn't it brilliant? "Here is a man of India. He is praying to his god. His god cannot help him. This must know about Jesus. Can you think of some ways to help him?" Split a pizza with him? Respect his right to have his imaginary friends, just like I have my own? Sell him a used Robert Anton Wilson book? The possibilities are endless! Filed under: General BS
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Posted on 10.12.05 by Widge @ 3:54 pm
You BASTARDS. Filed under: General BS
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Posted on 10.12.05 by Widge @ 3:51 pm
In between snickering at the idea of telling little kids that trick or treat for UNICEF this year that UNICEF killed the Smurfs, I realized a genius idea: Grab a bunch of people and be Zombie Smurfs for Halloween. I'm going to be at home watching movies, so feel free to take the idea and run with it. Just send me pictures. Filed under: General BS
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Posted on 10.12.05 by Widge @ 12:32 am
And October is home to Halloween, my favorite day of the year. So that's why I recorded a reading of "The Tell-Tale Heart". Don't worry, it all makes sense in my head, just roll with it. Filed under: General BS
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Posted on 10.10.05 by Widge @ 5:38 pm
How do you know it's the future? Because not only do we have nifty gadget blogs, we have people writing a blog to snark, and snark well, at the gadget blogs. It's…a beautiful day. Remember when you thought FidoNet was cool? Christ, I love living in the future. I shared this observation with Catalyst, who cautioned me thus: "Hold on to your nuts, though. We're still building speed. In the next three years or so we'll probably hit paisley." He is very wise. Filed under: General BS
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Posted on 10.10.05 by Widge @ 4:17 am
Finally, I've updated the column there on your right which has all of my writing listing. So yes, if you click on the cover art or the title, you get taken to a page which will tell you how to order Sunday Before You. Or hell, just click here. I've been busy getting initial orders shipped out, so thanks for everyone's patience. If you haven't gotten your copy, you should shortly. In other news, the plug-in I'm using to throw what I'm listening to at present up on the far right of the page (don't ask me why I did that, I'm a little lost on that as well) has hosed my play counts in iTunes, so I have no Top 10. I will say that Exit Mindbomb's Happy Accident is my favorite album this year, with "Any Day Now" currently messing with my head. The Killers' "All These Things That I've Done" is positively badass. As is "There She Goes, My Beautiful World" by Nick Cave. "If I Apologised" from the Mirrormask soundtrack is quite nice, as is Placebo's "Centrefolds." More shortly. I'm looking to revamp the DBM site as well. That should make at least three of you happy. Filed under: General BS
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Posted on 10.09.05 by Widge @ 4:47 pm
In the October 2005 issue of Harper's, the Harper's Index contained the following line item: Days after the London attacks that Bush said the U.S. was at war abroad "so we do not have to face them here at home": 4 The obvious implication being, because this is Harper's, that the attacks made Bush look foolish for saying such a thing. Say what you want about the President, and say what you want about the War on the T-Words, but last time I checked we had not, in fact, annexed Great Britain, nor England by itself. Certainly, if he had said, "so we do not have to face them here at home or in the homes of our close friends," you could point and snigger if you so chose. Considering it's hard enough to find school children in this country who could find the UK on a map, much less their own country, I suppose this is understandable, given the fact that Harper's is run by high schoolers. I'm sorry, someone's waving at me here. Yes, what is it? What's that? Really? Filed under: General BS
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Posted on 10.07.05 by Widge @ 11:02 pm
This post from Instapundit kinda bugs me. Basically, it's detailing a bunch of readers' responses to the letters they're getting back from their Congressional representatives. The topic? Cutting pork so the government can afford to pay for the damage in the wake of Katrina. Somehow, amazingly, people seem to be surprised at the reception their letters are getting with their Congressional reps. Which, to sum up, is basically, "ROTFLMAO. PORK? NO PORK HERE. K THX BYE." Considering the fact that both parties in this country are, at least fiscally, identical, why is this a surprise to anyone anywhere? I'm often fond of saying, "I can't wait until we get a two-party system in this country," because honestly, we don't have one. On domestic issues, the parties are interchangeable. So after years and years of sending people back to Congress, after years and years of people saying, "Yeah, vote the bastards out! Except, you know, your bastard…not mine. I'm okay with mine," we're surprised…? Glenn Reynolds even says that this kind of treatment of constituents is going to bring a term limit on Congress back into play…which I think is ridiculous. Not for Glenn to have said this, but I just the very idea is ludicrous. Enacting term limits is like saying, "We're too lazy to control how long you stay in Congress, so we're going to automate it." How lame is that? One reader comments: "What can be done to restore fiscal responsibility in this country? I wish I had that answer." Glenn responds with "I don't know, but I think we'll see a significant move to do something." Yes, and that something should be to vote out anyone who supports pork…which is pretty much everybody we have up in D.C. right now. Think it'll happen? Me neither. My Libertarian ass thinks that we should get back to government doing only what it was created to do…which would be…mercifully…very little. Filed under: General BS
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Posted on 10.02.05 by Widge @ 4:38 am
Let's pass legislation that says you can't talk on a cell phone and drive! No, I know you're thinking to yourself: Widge, aren't there reckless driving laws already on the books? If someone is driving recklessly with a cell phone isn't that…um…pretty much the same thing? And I say to you: no, we're thinking like politicians here. And any politician will (cough–never) readily admit that actually enforcing applicable laws isn't what will keep us safe! Enacting more laws that we can then ignore is what will keep us safe! Filed under: General BS
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John Robinson is a writer of prose, poetry and comics who also writes under
the pseudonym of Widgett Walls.
This is my latest book. Short stories written especially for you, or at least someone who reminded me a lot of you at the time.
