Jun
28
2005

Of Sandwiches and Hell

If, somehow, I become famous–or even infamous–please. Please. Don't let them name things after me like ham and cheese sandwiches. Do you think Doc Holliday likes going through eternity with a ham and cheese sandwich named after him? Does anything about Doc Holliday suggest a ham and cheese sandwich to you? (Granted, I'll be reviewing the soda named after him, but that's another post on a different site.) They can name an espresso drink after me, that's cool. But "Wyatt's Turkey with Provolone"? That's harsh, man. That's what hell is like.

This is hell:

GOD: "We're going to let you into heaven, boys."

TOMBSTONE GANG (Earps, Clantons and others): "Sweet! Thanks, Big G!"

GOD: (snickers) "Don't mention it."

WYATT: "Um…why is everyone laughing at us?"

When you're supposed to be a badass cowboy and folks are laughing at you and asking how the ice cream sundae business is going…that's what hell is like. I'm convinced.

Written by Widge in: Travel |

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Widge in his Overlook Hotel shirt

This is me.

No, really.

I am a writer, poet, spoken word performer, actor, singer, improviser, content creation and idea machine, freelance iconoclast, and the internet's janitor that dispenses pop culture wisdom to the protagonist of your choice. I have seen too many movies, read too many comic books, and when the zombies finally come, I'm the one you want to call. I sure as hell won't answer the phone, but it's the thought that counts. I advise people on the net, websites and technology, because I know these things instead of having a life or sleeping.

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