Jun
19
2005

Urge to Kill Rising

I am in the desert. It is 5am here. Outside, a legion of cheerful bird calls resound, heralding the new day. I am filled with the desperate need to find the bastards and kill them to shut them the hell up. Then I want to cook them and eat them. Sadly, the one thing I could have used as a weapon was taken from me by the TSA. It's obvious the birds and the government are working together against me.

In my semi-insane state, I keep expecting the dude from the Tokens to begin crooning "The Lion Sleeps Tonight," where upon I will want to kill, cook and eat him as well. You are all bastards. More later.

Written by Widge in: Travel |

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Widge in his natural habitat

This is me.

No, really.

I am a writer, poet, spoken word performer, actor, singer, improviser, content creation and idea machine, freelance iconoclast, and the internet's janitor that dispenses pop culture wisdom to the protagonist of your choice. I have seen too many movies, read too many comic books, and when the zombies finally come, I'm the one you want to call. I sure as hell won't answer the phone, but it's the thought that counts. I advise people on the net, websites and technology, because I know these things instead of having a life or sleeping.

If you like something I've done, donate to the Widge Wants to Kill His Day Job Fund. Or if you'd like to hire me for a job, my rates are terribly reasonable. We thank you.

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